M/36 and 29/F

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half now. We got into a big argument about our individual roles in a home and how we’d want to raise our children. I am of the opinion that a man should pay for the mortgage and the woman picks up everything else. And as far as kids, they should be allowed to go out and enjoy their lives, but not to the point of freely doing whatever. For example, I told him if we had a child who wanted to go out to party, then it’d be fine, but I’d be the parent hanging out in the parking lot making sure they don’t leave with anyone. He completely shut it down and said his kids aren’t going to parties, they can only go hang out with friends or the movies. I think he’s being a little delulu because we were all kids at one point & figured out ways to get around our parents, why wouldn’t our kids do the same to us?

He made a remark saying if he’s going to be the head of the household and be expected to provide and protect his family, then whatever he says is pretty much law. I thought that was extremely out of pocket.

Is his mindset a normal one to have in a marriage? To me, it should be about partnership, not who’s putting more financially than the other.

I should probably include he was in the military years ago, not sure if this plays into his mindset.