Served 26.5 Years. Lost Teammates. Seen Some Shit. VA Says ‘30% PTSD

Throwaway account.

TL;DR:
Filed my first VA claim, got 60%, and I'm super pissed.
I have no idea where to go from here. This might run long because, honestly, I need to vent.

Background:

I spent 26.5 years serving as a pilot in both the Navy and Air Force (yep, two services).
Retired in February 2023 with over 6,000 flight hours.

One of my more painful claims is PTSD.

Toward the end of my Navy flying career, we lost control of the aircraft—it spun out. We survived, but after that sortie, I walked into my skipper’s office, put my wings on his desk, and told him: “I think I’ve cheated death one too many times. Time for something new.” (maybe not those exact words, but something similar)

The Next Chapter

A year later, I transitioned to the Air Force, where I spent 14 years mastering the MQ-9 unmanned aircraft. We took tactics to another level, worked closely with the dudes on the ground, and took the fight to the enemy.

I had my fair share of shots—and I wouldn’t take any of them back.

Until… mid-2017.

A day I wish I could take back.

The Incident

Dawn was breaking, and we tracked three individuals meeting in an abandoned structure. The ground force commander saw our feed and told us via JTACs to set strike posture. We did our thing, smoke cleared—and we learned we had just hit friendlies.

“Knock it off.”

Start making phone calls to the JTACs

WTF, over?

We got Jason Bourne answers. “Don’t talk about this.”

The Fallout

A month later, I found myself in a private shrink’s office, using every coping technique in the book to keep my sanity—and my failing marriage—together.

By session seven, my private therapist started hitting on me.

Not even making this shit up. She was kind of hot but I didn't cross any lines.

Three years later?

Divorced.

Kids won’t talk to me.

Six years after the incident?

Tired of writing one more damn OPR.

Done.

I had 20+ years in, but it wasn’t fun anymore.

Then I found you maniacs on these threads and started putting my VA claim together. Filed in October 2023.

The VA Process

A month after I file, I get a C&P exam—a Zoom call with a shrink.

Standard childhood questions.

I tell her I’m in a good place now but came from a dark one—silver gun in my hand, Jeep Cherokee in drive, staring over the edge of a cliff.

She nods.

Then I open up about the 2017 incident—and burst into tears.

She nods more. Asks a few more questions.

The Decision

I get my claim results:

PTSD—30%.

WTF, over?

I see red.

I throw my phone down and scream.

These fucking guys want a fight.

I KNOW 100% isn’t the goal—I truly believe that.

But I just want a fair shake.

I personally know Navy dudes who did ONE tour, got screamed at in boot camp, and walked away with higher ratings than this.

This is bullshit.

I’ve put in the work:

-Meditation.

-Monthly therapy sessions (Vet Center).

-And all of it feels undone in a day.

I was so pissed, I told my new and much hotter wife, “I need to go for a drive.” I'm fine so this is NOT a cry for help.

So here I am, writing this post.

Thanks for reading—I know it’s long, but damn, these raters and examiners can really suck.
Any advice?

Edited:
Inserted private therapist because i had a TS/SCI clearance and didn't want to jeapordize that.
Removed a typo.